peace, peace, God's peace....

today a friend cried as she told me a picture the Lord showed her of me on her way to my house for breakfast. she was praying for me and she saw this beautiful picture of.... and in it I was.... and then there came a ....and instead of....

and it was the most beautiful picture and a total confirmation to me of what the Lord has been speaking over me. what struck me the most was how comforting it was to me. the Lord chose to comfort my heart through the word from this friend...

thank you, friend for your joy and tears
my heart is so grateful...

Ethereal Beauty

unfolding...

words spoken
without form
thoughts like air
floating, warm
i can see the picture starting to gel
like airborn molecules of another realm

[like static electricity, come and look at this with me]

i can see the picture now

i wanted to show you before
but the words wouldn't form


thoughts like air
hanging there

now I know what i see
do you know what i see?
(with pairs of eyes now watching me)

its hard to tell you what I mean
but i really love you and I want you to see
the picture of love that is visible to me

this is how i live, how i see
its how i know
and how i breathe

this is how i think, how i feel
pictures of love both ethereal and real

words like air
in motion and real
words like air
but potent still.

The Captain of the Host

Lord, (Heavenly Father)

For such a time as this
You have anointed and appointed
For such a time as this
Fathers and mothers and sisters and brothers.
Family for the lost, the lonely, the hurting, and afraid.
One voice.
In unity.
Choices made.
Family, friends, and co-laborers in your fields.
Harvest
Choice.
In unity.
Rejoice.
The captain of the host is Jesus.
Your wish is my command.
Marching orders.
Rank and order.
Territory.
Assigned for glory.
The captain of the host is Jesus.

Tears Like Prayers.... Luke 7:38

37When a woman who had lived a sinful life in that town learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee's house, she brought an alabaster jar of perfume,

38and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them. .

Voluntary Weakness, Humility, and Love

Weakness and Love

Strong on the inside
Christ in me.
Strength wrapped in weakness
Voluntary meekness.


Strength under control.


Like a muscle
That is kept
not flaunted.

Christ in me.

My glory.


Strength in me.
Authority.


Demonstrating strength
Made perfect in weakness.
Brilliantly perfected in weakness and love.
I will arise and go forth in the name of the Lord

Meekness.
Protection.
Humility
and Love.

Power released
Authority.
Healing.

Christ in me.

II Corinthians 4:7 "But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us."

I Corinthians 4:20 "For the kingdom of God is not a matter of talk but of power."

Luke 12:32 "Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom."

Matthew 16:19 "I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven."





I am...
a voice
a presence
a helper
a giver.

empty of self
full of love
ready to give all.

Made to be...

loved and enjoyed.

seeing.

being

occasionally speaking...

I am...
a prophet
an intercessor
a seer
a speaker.

Christ in me.

Walk in authority and holding the keys...

humility
meekness
wisdom
love.

Confidence

What is and will be.
Strength in weakness.

Humility

Being.




1 Corinthians 13



Love


1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.

11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Woundedness and Love.

The process of being truly conformed to Christ compels us into deeper degrees of transformation. Indeed, just as Jesus learned obedience through the things that He suffered (see Hebrews 5:8), so also must we. And it is here, even while we stand in intercession or service to God, that Christ gives us the gift of woundedness.

"Gift?" you ask.

Yes, to be wounded in the service of mercy and, instead of closing our hearts, allow woundedness to crown love, is to release God's power in redemption. The steadfast prayer of the wounded intercessor holds great sway upon the heart of God.

We cannot become Christlike without being wounded. You see, even after we come to Christ, we carry encoded within us preset limits concerning how far we will go for love, and how much we are willing to suffer for redemption. When God allows us to be wounded, He exposes those human boundaries and reveals what we lack of His nature.


The path narrows as we seek true transformation. Indeed, many Christians fall short of Christ's stature because they have been hurt and offended by people. They leave churches discouraged, vowing never again to serve or lead or contribute because, when they offered themselves, their gift was marred by unloving people. To be struck or rejected in the administration of our service can become a great offense to us, especially as we are waiting for, and even expecting, a reward for our good efforts.

Yet wounding is inevitable if we are following Christ. Jesus was both "marred" (Isaiah 52:14) and "wounded" (Zechariah 13:6), and if we are sincere in our pursuit of His nature, we will suffer as well. How else will love be perfected?

--Francis Frangipane

Tender Love

Tender love
I will keep you warm

Stoke the fires of love
In the eye of the storm

Gentle whispers
With the tears rolling down

I see where you're coming from

I want to be around.

From a mile away
I will capture your gaze


For look in my eyes
You can see my heart best


You don't have to wander
You really can rest.

More on the White Horses...

Here is a poem-prayer written by another for a friend of mine. Someone sent this poem to me b/c they thought I may find it comforting in general. Funny enough, I had just written the other poem below (Running Horses: Revolution) the night before. They had no idea what had been going on in my heart this last week regarding these topics. God, help us all who are faithful in love with You and who want our strength to be bridled without losing our spirit. I remember that someone once prayed and prophesied over me that I am like the sword maiden in Lord of the Rings who is mighty with the sword and longs to be free. (Well, that doesn't mean I don't thrive in relationships...it just means I long to be understood in that.) :-)

There is a reason for that passion. It is not meant to keep people away or to be independent. It is meant to be the fullness of what and who we are in the fullness of our free spirit. It is meant to be brought into the fullness of strength and the fullness of love and the fullness of running. It is not independence. It is not rebellion. It is not impossible to be bridled or brought into a pack. It is just a flavor of beauty that is meant to be all that it is meant to be. The easiest way to crush the spirit of one who is free is to tell it that it has to be something other than what it is made to be....

Thank you to the one who sent me this poem. It was so timely and needed. I appreciate this and all that the Lord is teaching me regarding all of this at this time.... This topic has come up through a variety of circumstances and I am learning that I have to trust others that just because they want to harness that strength that they are not going to crush my spirit.

I am free.


Heavenly Father
I praise You for Your daughter
like a white stallion
who cannot be bridled
Though they may try

though they have the bit in her mouth
though they surround her and pull her down to tame her
they cannot
she won't have it
Just a gentle touch of the windin her mane
is enough to send her rearing
and crying out to God, "Set me free from them."

Though they are many they cannot hold her
cannot break the spirit rising now
cannot give her to the marketplaceto be sold
to one other than her Maker

Her spirit is strong and will not be broken
courageous and will not falter
Until she is running freely in the groves and along shores
exalting Jesus as Lord.

A message for a flower...

THEN THE TIME CAME WHEN THE RISK IT TOOK TO REMAIN TIGHT IN A BUD WAS MORE PAINFUL THAN THE RISK IT TOOK TO BLOSSOM. ~ ANAIS NIN

Running Horses: Revolution

running, running
hearts desire
horses running
balls of fire
rolling, rolling
off their manes
the faster they run
the brighter the flames
freely, freely
running freely
hearts of fire
singing sweetly
white horses running
far, far away
freedom is their melody
fire is their mane
the faster they go
the larger the fire
rolls from their manes
in burning desire
feasting, feasting
feasting their eyes
one goal before them
one Man the prize
run freely horses
remember the pain
that held you back
when you were enchained
run freely horses
with the fires of love
there is One who is for you
with heart made of love
don't stop your running
or your freedom song
its yours to sing
and they're singing along
the many horses that are joining your tribe
one nation born
in freedom
RIDE!
dance, dance
feel the beat and the fusion
the horses are trotting to
the beat of revolution
run freely white horses
with rolling manes of fire
your freedom is given
you never will tire
sing revolution
freedom and love
burning desire
that comes from above
these horses from heaven
were shown me on earth
i was told i am like them
for what it is worth.
:-)

"I was prayin for ya and thought I would tell ya what I felt God saying. I felt God was saying It is released. It is released. I felt it was something that is something that you and God know about deep in the recesses of you. I felt like It has been released and so know it is coming. Timing, I felt was out of his hands of sorts like it is released and depending on stuff between there and you it will arrive. So just know it. Felt like you would dance about it, like a happy dance."

:-) How can I help but smile when receiving this email. First of all, this email came from a new friend. 2nd, yes--there is something that me and God know about deep within the recesses of me. And last, the Lord and I have been talking about just such a release. This is a beautiful confirmation to me from a beloved new friend. (Thank you, Lord. And thank you new friend!)

And by the way, I will be doing a VERY happy dance. :-)

The Lord and I have LOTS of secrets! Like Mary, He has allowed me to ponder a lot while being very quiet! But He is so fun! It is just like Him to give a little clue like this to let me know He is thinking about our secrets and moving on them behind the scenes! He is awesome! He is God!

The Downpour of the Lord

“God's voice thunders in marvelous ways; he does great things beyond our understanding. He says to the snow, 'Fall on the earth,' and to the rain shower, 'Be a mighty downpour.' Job 37:5-6

He sets the lonely in families.

Psalm 68:6 "God sets the lonely in families."



Last night I dreamed that I was traveling the world and I was doing many things on this trip. I was on the trip alone, but there were many, many people around me. I stepped onto a stage and I don't know if there were any people there or not (I don't remember seeing any people). But the Lord had given me a message of power and I released it over the microphone and the message went out. I don't know what I said, but I know that it was the power of God and the arrows of the Lord going deep and far. I watched a video of it later in the dream and the video had no sound. I never heard what I said, but knew the arrows of the Lord were coming out.



When I woke up I realized that the word I was giving with my life in that dream was Psalm 68:6 "God sets the lonely in families." And the Lord showed me the great need for this message--not just in words--but in His desire to bring RESTORATION to families--to the broken hearts in the inner city and also to the orphans of the world. The Lord is bringing restoration to the family.

Being raised in a loving family is something the enemy is trying to destroy. He has already wreaked havoc and brought destruction in the lives of so many people. God is calling us to take and live a different approach and to take up this calling and anointing for the restoration of the family.



In the dream the Lord showed me that this would be a huge life message that would be lived out and carried out by me and my husband. There is a world out there that has no idea what it means to be loved in the context of a family and God is wanting to restore that to those who have never had. He is wanting to bring healing to devastation and to protect, defend, and restore the family unit in America and all over the world! He wants the orphans to know He sets the lonely in families and that they are not alone. He wants those who have never had fathers or husbands or mothers or brothers to know that they are loved and that there is a God who loves them and people around them who represent the face of God right in front of them.



Oh Lord, please bring restoration to the families of the world. Turn the hearts of the fathers to their children and the children to their fathers. Please restore the broken hearts of this generation and meet the lonely and tell them they are not alone. And Lord, let us carry this mantle of anointing for family and raise a generation who will know you as Father and Husband and who will be cared for by fathers and mothers who know that this destruction has been a specific attack.



May the grace of God come under the many who are anointed to carry this call for family and to trumpet it while raising the next generation so that there can be a true turning of the hearts of the fathers and children toward one another. I pray this in the name of Jesus--especially for the orphans and inner city children and broken families of the world.



Amen.

Theme Songs: The Beu Sisters: Catch Me If You Can

What you get is
What you see
And you can bet it's worth it, baby
'Cause what you get is me.

So keep it real and just say what you feel
Don't be scared to fall in love.

Do you really want it, if you want it you can get it
If you get it don't regret it, I can bet you're gonna let it take you
Higher and higher (so what you gonna do?)
Love is like a butterfly, tapestry across the sky
Doesn't need a reason why
Feel it taking you and I
Higher and higher (I wanna get with you)

So, catch me if you can
Oh, catch me if you can.

Now you know, just what it takes
To make a little bit of heaven, baby.
So hold on tight, but learn to let go.
We'll be free to be every color of the rainbow.

Don't be afraid to, let it embrace you
I'm gonna show you every little thing about love, yeah.

Do you really want it, if you want it you can get it
If you get it don't regret it, I can bet you're gonna let it take you
Higher and higher (so what you gonna do)
Love is like a butterfly, tapestry across the sky
Doesn't need a reason why
Feel it taking you and I
Higher and higher (I wanna get with you)

So, catch me if you can

I know you don't wanna show how you feel
So you try and deny that your feelings are real
'cause you're scared to believe all you need is l-o-v-e, love
(All you need is love)
You can run, you can hide, but you know down inside
It will catch up to you, when you see you will find out
You better believe all you need is l-o-v-e love, love

Do you really want it, if you want it you can get it
If you get it don't regret it, I can bet you're gonna let it take you
Higher and higher (what you gonna do)
Love is like a butterfly, tapestry across the sky
Doesn't need a reason why
Feel it taking you and I
Higher and higher (I wanna get with you)

Do you really want it, if you want it you can get it
If you get it don't regret it, I can bet you're gonna let it take you
Higher and higher
Love is like a butterfly, tapestry across the sky
Doesn't need a reason why
Feel it taking you and I
Higher and higher

I know you want me baby
Come on and get me baby

Tiny Dancer (Theme Song)

"Tiny Dancer"



Blue jean baby, L.A. lady, seamstress for the band

Pretty eyed, pirate smile, you'll marry a music man

Ballerina, you must have seen her dancing in the sand

And now she's in me, always with me, tiny dancer in my hand



Jesus freaks out in the street

Handing tickets out for God

Turning back she just laughs

The boulevard is not that bad



Piano man he makes his stand

In the auditorium

Looking on she sings the songs

The words she knows the tune she hums



But oh how it feels so real

Lying here with no one near

Only you and you can hear me

When I say softly slowly



Hold me closer tiny dancer

Count the headlights on the highway

Lay me down in sheets of linen

you had a busy day today



Blue jean baby, L.A. lady, seamstress for the band

Pretty eyed, pirate smile, you'll marry a music man

Ballerina, you must have seen her dancing in the sand

And now she's in me, always with me, tiny dancer in my hand

Theme Songs: Time and Confusion: Anberlin

woah oh, yeah-ahwoah oh, yeah-ahwoah oh

live for today we'll dream tomorrow
we've got big plans in sight
we'll take this city and by nightfall...
the bright lights are calling

everything is going our way
everything is just as we've planned
this is our future (from what we've heard)
and i've still got your hand

and it feels like we could last forever
and i'm not doing this alone

[Chorus]
when memories fade
we've got each other
when time and confusion collide
singin' i hold it all when i hold you

when friends walk other ways
we've got each other
i hold it all when i hold
i hold it all when i hold you

woah oh, yeah-ahwoah oh, yeah-ahwoah oh

we fell on hard times
this isn't the ideal
we're miles from home doing the best that we can
(best that we can)

i won't do this without you
i won't do this without you so take heart...
'cause you know that you have mine

and it feels like we could last forever
and i'm not doing to do this alone

[Chorus]
[Bridge:]
its not about the money we make
its about the passions that we ache for
what makes your heart beat faster
tell me now what does your body long after
i don't care now where we live
it's not where, or what, or who we were with
i just need you in my life
so promise me again

when memories fade
we've got each other
when time and confusion collide
singin' i hold it all when i hold you

when friends walk other ways
we've got each other
i hold it all when i hold i hold it all when i hold you

woah oh, yeah-ahwoah oh, yeah-ahwoah oh

Tears in a bottle: known, loved, and free.

Tears in a bottle
Treasured and stored.
No one can cry
From a heart made of stone.
Wring out my heart
Make it wet with your tears
Until I can cry with you
Again and again.

Cry again
Oh my soul
Pain has become you
And made your heart whole
Love, love
Until you can’t stand it
This is the way that love will demand it.
Love, lover
Feel the pain of the yearning.
This is the fire of love that is burning.
Touch my heart.
Take this hand by my side
You are my Husband
I am your Bride


Feel the pain
Of opening
Opening your chest
Sharing love's secrets
And finding love’s rest.
You are the lover
And open will be
All who are intimate
Known, loved,
And free

On the topic of pain...and Human Trafficking.

Alright, here it is...such pain. I cannot even handle it or take it in. For one thing, as we recently found out...I'm a 7 on the Enneagram--a liver of LIFE--and an avoider of pain. (Now, I don't really avoid pain, but feel it extremely deeply for others who are in deep places of pain. It moves me DEEPLY and, thankfully, I understand a lot more about human suffering and joy now than I did back in the day!)

Let's talk about when my Grandma was diagnosed with advanced Leukemia--my Grandma whom I love and who loves me dearly. Let's remember when I went with her to the hospital and stayed for several days. I took notes from the doctors, kept her in good spirits, prayed with her. Then lets talk about several weeks later when she was in the hospital again having suffered a heart attack from the medicine. She was in so much pain, I stayed for an hour and LITERALLY FELT MY ADRENALS SHUT DOWN. I left sobbing silently and checked myself into a hotel for the rest of the night while she slept.

When there is intense suffering involved and a vulnerable person (I mean one that even the Lord in Scripture would generally regard as weak or in need of protection or love) I am inclined to feel an extraordinary amount of their pain. When, it is someone who I consider stronger or more understanding or equipped, I still feel it, but I do not shut down b/c of it! I still love deeply, but I can more naturally manage the pain.

Perhaps this is what led the Lord to prophesy over me so many, many times about being in the healing professions--maybe not so much in the literal sense, but for all He is desiring to heal--to nurture them and bind up their wounds and to teach them to find the same joy in the Lord that I have found--a joy that is not dependent on circumstances, but on the God who made us. :-)

In the last 2 years I have come across something that I had never come across before. This is the issue of Human Trafficking. I simply cannot handle the subject, but by the grace of God. I've been raising awareness for over a year--formerly helping Faceless International as a volunteer and more actively through Zenia Clothing Company which was started over a year ago to help raise awareness and bring in resources to help women and children who are involved in this horrible thing.

For those of you who don't know...Human Trafficking is a form of slave labor most often involving women and especially children who have been sold, stolen, or kidnapped and then sold again into the sex trade industries in various countries including our own.

Many people think that slavery is an old issue and doesn't exist in the world today. You are wrong. It is a horrible injustice. Having worked with women who have chosen to be involved in the sex trade industries for various reasons and the impact it has had on them (Red Light District, Amsterdam-- even in our very own Grand Rapids, MI) was hard enough. Imagine the millions of children who are taken as early as 2,3, and 4 to be trained as sex slaves to locals and foreignors throughout the world. It is WRONG.

This last year, I have been partnering in prayer with a friend and mentor, Dr. Bob Hagerty (formerly Vice President of Cornerstone University and President and Superintendant of several other schools). He is the great nephew of George Mueller, who many of you know rescued THOUSANDS of street orphans in England in the 1800's. Dr. Hagerty has been working with locals in Myanmar for the last year and half--well before the Cyclone hit--and has helped the locals there in establishing orphanages that they had in their heart to begin. He has been working here in the States praying and raising support and awareness of the needs there--especially after the CYCLONE destroyed the orphanages--though every single orphan and staff member was saved! He has also been going back and forth to help and see firsthand the work that is being done in the face of such great need.

One of the greatest dangers for children in Myanmar (formerly Burma) right now is that many have been orphaned or separated from their parents because of the CYCLONE and are at great risk for being kidnapped into the sex trade industries of Thailand. The government is working (amazingly) to try to set up refuge camps for the children, but there is a great need for orphanages to be built and for people to come and staff them.

I have been invited to go in 2009 and will definately be seeking the Lord as to how long I will be able to take on this adventure. These children have already been breaking my heart. The country is in a devestated position still in the aftermath of the cyclone.

Many of you know that I just recently returned from a really nice trip to Asia--Taiwan, Hong Kong, and Korea--helping my friend Jaeson and his ministry team at some conferences and trainings for young Asian students who are committed to making a difference in the world through church planting and spending two years in unevangelized areas of Asia and the Middle East.

While in Taiwan, I got a serious invitation to go with Dr. Hagerty to Myanmar. In Hong Kong, the Holy Spirit hit me with a serious burden and weeping intercession for these children. I got seven more confirmations before I had even come home. Since I have arrived in Kansas City, the Lord continually is talking with me about these children!!! I have had many more connections and confirmations since arriving here less than 3 weeks ago!

Ah! Pray for the pain that they feel to be healed by Jesus. I will never forget in Hong Kong. I have no idea what was preached or what joyful song was played during the music set. I was weeping the whole night for these little ones. I kept saying to the Lord... "Oh Lord, the pain" (because I could feel it and I was literally sobbing). And yet I know I can't fully know it.
Then I would pray, "Oh Lord, you know I literally have nothing to give."

And this is what is painful for me. In Hong Kong, my friend Chris quoted Heidi Baker,"It is dangerous to have love without power or power without love." He went on to explain that love without power is devestating b/c you see the need, but know there is nothing you can do about it. Power without love is dangerous b/c it breeds pride and abuse of power. This made so much sense to me. This is why my adrenal glands shut down when I see people dying in pain and there is nothing I can do about it. I have love, but no power of my own....

So in Hong Kong, I prayed, "Lord, I have nothing to give. Finally, I am empty of self. I KNOW I have NOTHING TO GIVE! Lord, you have to stand behind me and give the children bread. I cannot heal them. I cannot feed them. But I can stand in front of you and pass to them what you give me. I can lay my hands on them and You can heal them. I have nothing in my hands, but You can do it..and you must!" (Matthew 15:25-28)

I have no power, but He literally has ALL power.

So I have changed the way that I pray now. The reasons 7's avoid pain is b/c they know the world is supposed to be joyful and fully restored. And yet an integrated 7 knows that we are the means through which the Lord will start to bring justice and action and help. He will restore THROUGH us. (Isaiah 61). Oh, how I have known this.

And I have been given a grace... to sleep with the rats if necessary. God has given me this willingness and this grace because there is a world out there in need.

I pray for grace to face the pain and to seek the Lord for His healing and kindness to come through me and the many others who will go.

James 1:27 "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

These recent blogs have not been extremely well written and are extremely raw. I really want to sit down and write some articles and other things that will take some time. But for now, this very small amount of information seems enough to say we've "bitten off more than we can chew."

Let's ask God to help us to assimilate the needs of human suffering across the world--while letting Him carry the burden and the pain.

By the way, we need more people to go! Feel free to contact me if you are interested in learning more, praying more specifically, or actually going to see the needs and be part of the solution!

WAYS TO HELP:

1) I know of two very reputable, dynamic ministry organization that are helping with this cause. If you would like to donate to helping the children directly, please contact:

Dr. Bob Hagerty with Mercy For the Children, Myanmar: Roberth@netpenny.net

or Levi Lim at: http://www.ilovemyanmar.org/

2) Also, you can help support Zenia Clothing Company that works to promote awareness and raise funds for these needs: www.myspace.com/zeniaclothing

3) And you can pray for me and the many others who will be working with orphans this year and the issue of stopping human trafficking. If you are interested in supporting a missionary later in the year, I will be going to work with the children myself. I would love to have your prayers and financial backing! Those who can't go...SEND! :-)

Many blessings!
~Sarah Weichhand

Another site with resources and other links: http://www.facelessinternational.com/

I have to add as a post script thought: Helping these children just to help them is a wonderful thing. I have spent the last year observing that many people are trying to help these women and children and end this injustice. We cannot do this on our own. We cannot save, deliver, or heal of ourselves. The best human ideas and actions fall sooooo short of what only God can do. Only God can turn hearts of government officials and raise up workers to go. Only God can bring physical healing to bodies that have been ripped and devestated and physically and sexually abused. Only God can mend a heart. We cannot do this with our best human counseling and attempts at providing other jobs for these children. WE must marry our actions with our prayers to a BIG GOD who can do what ONLY HE CAN DO!!! We can help, but we cannot save, heal, or deliver without Him! Please join with me in prayer for these children.

II Thessalonians 3:1-5

Request for Prayer for the children: 1Finally, brothers, pray for us that the message of the Lord may spread rapidly and be honored, just as it was with you. 2And pray that we may be delivered from wicked and evil men, for not everyone has faith. 3But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one. 4We have confidence in the Lord that you are doing and will continue to do the things we command. 5May the Lord direct your hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance.

Prayer for these organizations, young missionaries like myself, and others who will go...
I Thessalonians 1:5 "For our gospel did not come to you in word only, but also in power, and in the Holy Spirit and in much assurance, as you know what kind of men we were among you for your sake."

Thank you! I also just read on my friend Jaeson's blog that there is a documentary coming out that will start to expose the industry by bringing it out to the public. You can watch that pilot for that film here: http://www.jaesonma.com/

Butterflies and Free Spirits 9/27/08

I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be a free spirit again. Freedom has always been my song and my life creed.

"It is for freedom that we were set free, therefore do not be entangled again by a yoke of slavery!" (Gal. 5:1)

I will always have freedom!

...Freedom from sin and religion!!
...Freedom to love and to be loved!!!!

(I love that...Freedom from...and freedom TO...) :-)

Freedom is not merely the absence of restraint, but it is the ability to choose where to focus time, love, attention, etc... and on whom. This is what is so beautiful about love. It is a choice--made out of freedom.

I choose to bring myself into the flight pattern of another or to run with another. I choose to follow the leading of the Holy Spirit. I choose who I want to be in covenantal relationship with.

No one can take away my choice. They could take away my life before they can take my choice.
Love has to be given freely.

And... I'll add to that...that sometimes in following the leading of the Holy Spirit, He seems to lead you away before He leads you to. (This reminds me of Hind's Feet on High Places! Oh how I wept through parts of that book--especially when the Shepherd leads Much Afraid AWAY from the High Places.) It is a strict obedience to the cross.

Even though I have a choice in my heart's desire, my first commitment is to honor God and the leading of His Holy Spirit--even if He is giving me glimpses of things to come. He has a timetable worked out. He has a plan. He doesn't leave us out of the plan, but speaks to us daily, encourages us, directs us, prompts us, blesses us, and even sometimes commands or requests of us. (Galatians 5:25)

I know for sure GOD is getting ready to launch me into a new season soon (soon in comparison to the stretching 28 years of my life)! Right now is a brief pause--as a moment of transition between movements. As with other dreams, I have always trusted Him to cross my path with my "other" exactly in the way He wisely would choose. And I've always trusted it would be GOOD!!! When I am presented with a choice (a man who invites me to choose him), I will gladly make that choice. In this moment--in having to choose between taking what I want now...or waiting for what the Spirit is going to do...I have to love and obey the Spirit first. Once I am in a flight pattern with another--the Spirit will lead us together and I will follow that lead. While we may have different roles or be away from each other at times, the Spirit will not lead us apart. We will be led together.

In the meantime, I am trusting the Spirit is leading our paths to cross and intersect perfectly, that we will recognize and choose each other, and that I will be recognized as an "other." ;-)

I just found out that I am a 7 on the Enneagram (an ancient personality profile detailing 9 personality types and their growth, development, and spirituality). 7's greatest fear is being deprived or trapped in pain. Their basic desire is to be happy, satisfied, and find fulfillment.

It is possible to be in a relationship that involves the utmost human commitment (covenant) and true "oneness" (Book of John) that God calls for when He says that two can become one--and still have perfect freedom in relationship. Freedom is not for self. Freedom is for love.

So... love gives freedom and freedom...can give love?!

Yes. It is a grand decision. And one I will look forward to making... :-)

(Gal. 5:13, I Peter 2:16)

"My heart has asked for you to crawl in, but sometimes I have resisted my heart."

The Spirit and the glory. And the poem of waiting....

"I am so filled with the glory of the Lord and the intensity of His glory that I can't even handle it myself. My mouth is closed. My mind is full and at peace. My body shakes with the intensity of it all. My heart wants to leap of out of my body and run into the purposes of the Lord. I cannot go any faster than the timing of the Lord. I can only move at the pace He is moving and in the meantime I am filled with more intensity than this little body can handle or hold. Oh Jesus, make my body and soul align with you as I worship and move with you in both Spirit and in Truth."

I wrote this post a while ago and saved it as a draft. I also just found this poem below that I wrote maybe 6 months ago. Its a "cute" poem. It describes how I've been held in a waiting pattern and am so eager to go forward and yet am caught up in the timing of the Lord--refusing to move faster than His pace. :-) I am still in the wrapping up of this season. I am still moving at His pace and no faster. I am gifted. I am trained. I am a lady waiting to be released into another season with another pace--a pace that scares me honestly! Still, I wait... I wait for the timing and the release of the Lord. For now, I receive this season as a gift--this time of waiting for the future as a gift of the present. I am happy, contented, joyful, and expectantly waiting! :-)


Dreams, simple dreams.
Are often working out in the subconscious of my mind
In the night—I leap, I fly…
In the day, I sleep, I lie…
Waiting, waiting..
Hesitating?
Standing, then sitting
Is this really living?
I jump up.
You motion me down.
My eyes are open
I’m looking around.
The world is turning and passing me by
I wait and I trust. I can smile and cry.
“No good thing will I withhold from you.”
I believe you
Based on your Word
Your character and your Word
I’ve heard your voice.
You’ve seen where I sleep.
I’ve got to believe you have something for me.


Have you ever seen a girl so eager?
Watch her lips quaver, she’s so eager?
See her tears of longing…
Longing bitter
The tears of her heart could have cried you a river.
She’s standing there smiling
Waiting for Me.
The One her heart loves
Whom with faith she can see.
I won’t disappoint her
Not for eternity
I’m setting her up.
Just watch her wait and see.

Love Letter. Sealed with a kiss.

This week I experienced a love letter from the Lord. I had no idea that He was going to give it to me and I have found myself so blessed because I get to listen to it over and over. I was expecting the Lord to tell me something great or wonderful that He was going to call me to do… and instead…all He said was “I really love you.” I realized that at first I was disappointed. I wanted an assignment. I wanted something to do. But all He wanted me to know was that He values our relationship soooo much. (Thank you!)

The next day, I was at a training in Kansas City for some future work I will be doing in Asia and beyond. I heard the Lord speak love over me and as the man who was teaching prayed for me, I felt the Holy Spirit come upon me in love in a way that made me lose my ability to stand. I could only be filled with His love and His presence and rest in it. I later took a nap and enjoyed further fellowship with the Holy Spirit--just laying there enjoying His presence! He is so good.

If the first day was a love letter, the second day was the Lord sealing it with a kiss. What a special message that God wanted to bring! The last three years of waiting on the Lord and being hidden in His time and location brought me to a place of rest and trust, settling into the dynamics of relationship instead of just doing all the time, I think this is a good message for me as I think of my future husband. That our lives may be purposed to serve the Lord and fulfill His purposes together, but the value is not on the doing, but on the relationship with God and each other.
God has sealed his message of love to me these last three years with a letter of love and a kiss. I am so blessed.

“Set me as a seal upon your heart, like a seal upon your arm: for love is as strong as death, jealousy is as hard and cruel as Sheol. Its flashes are flashes of fire, a most vehement flame (the very flame of the Lord)! Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it. If a man tried to sell everything he owned for love, he could not do it.” Song of Solomon 8:6,7

Forever

Forever


Come and sing with me
Looking in my eyes
And smiling, too.


I am with you now.
For a moment now
I am smiling, too.


I am crying now
For what might have been

The music stopped
Were you crying, too?


I was at the theatre
I sat with you.
The film ran out
What a dazzling jewel.


It all seems over now.

Does the north wind blow
Now over my soul?


Winds, refresh me!
Come glorious winds!
Make this boat take sail
With my face to the wind

And the sun on my back
I am willing to go
With you.


Just take me with your flow

With the wind
Against the tide
Put the wind in my sail
And take me there.


I am smiling at you

Know there's nothing I can do.


I wait for the wind
To embrace my sail
And I long for you
Like a child would do.


And I wait and I wonder
What will become of me?
Wind, take my sails.

Come along to the land!

I go now toward the sand!
(Won't you please take my hand?)


I am with you for the ride.
The wild ride.
The pleasurable ride.
Make a go with me on the wild side.

Adventure is calling.


Just take me away

With the wind in my sails
I trust you now to get me there.

Lamentations 3

Almighty God
Be ever near me
Clarify my heart before you
Do unto me according to Your Word
Ever faithful God
Forget not your little daughter
Grant me the desires of our hearts together
Hear my prayers.
I love you, Lord
Just as I always knew I would
Kind forever
Limitless God
My favored One
Never leaving nor forsaking
Open for all to come running to Your arms
Present Helper
Quest of my all
Reason with me
Share your heart
Thank you always
Understanding
Very
Wise
Xalted God
You are mine
Zealous Fiery One.

Who can handle me?
If you can handle me,
I challenge you
To tame this heart
And travel with me
To the ends of the earth
And the depths of my soul.
You can handle it, sir.
Its not that hard.

~Leaping Fawn to the one who rides with the horses of fire. The Story of My Life.